by Coach Tina | Sep 21, 2016 | Fear, Growth
Do you remember the Arsenio Hall Show? I loved the “things that make you go hmmm” segment. This week has been one of those weeks for our nation. All the senseless shootings and gas limitations. It makes you wonder what’s going on.
You see, I am not one of those super saints – I got questions. I know God will never put more on us than we can bare. I know there is a lesson in this somewhere. According to the bible these are signs of the end of time. I got ALL of that. I know we will never know the answer to everything that happens.
But when people are being killed by those that have vowed to protect them. When children are being killed by the person who helped bring them into the 
world. When young girls are found lying in the street and NO one seems to know what happened. It makes you wonder what in the world is really going on.
Well I don’t have the answer! I know my heart hurts behind it all. I know it makes me pray a little longer. I know it makes me call and check on my children more often. I know it makes me immediately pick up the phone and call someone that cross my mind. It makes me not take life for granted. It makes me remember tomorrow is not promised. It makes me appreciate what I have instead of focusing on what I don’t. It makes me work harder to forgive someone that has hurt me. I makes me want better instead of settling for mediocre. It makes me love a little harder. It makes me a little more compassionate. It makes me seek ways of understanding instead of letting it just be.
So with everything going on, could this be a time when God is trying to get us to focus on the things that matter instead of the superficial things of the world? Is He trying to get us to live a life of forgiveness and unconditional love? Maybe He is trying to draw us closer to Him when things just don’t make sense. I’m not saying God is causing all these things to happen (in fact I know He’s not) – what I am saying is He promised to make good out of all things and I have to believe in His promises. There has to be something good that comes out of this mess.
HMMMM… People are becoming more aware of their surroundings. People are looking into history to see where all this hatred actually stemmed from. People are holding their families closer. People are conserving their resources. People are becoming more compassionate to their brothers and sisters. People are standing in support of what they believe. But there has to be more.
Will people truly seek God for answers? Will we begin to pray more? Will we begin to love more? There has to be something not just good but great that comes out of all this pain… but what will it be? What do you think? Do you have any ideas of what we are to learn from this? Share your thoughts I’d love to hear what you have to say.
Until Next Time,
by Coach Tina | Sep 9, 2016 | Focus, Growth
The words that came from your mouth set a fire inside of me. My first response was to lash back and demand that you see me. To demand that you hear me. To stand up for myself. To let you know it would not be tolerated. But soon I realized my words fell on deaf ears and regardless of what I said you were not going to hear it because you were caught up in your own feelings and mine really didn’t matter.
When a people lash out at you, don’t take it personal. They are coming from a place of need. The need to be heard, the need to be loved, the need to be accepted. If you are able to offer any of this, do so. If not, pray and ask God to help you be able to do so.
Growing up I was not one to fight, but I would use my words to combat and bring tears to those that hurt me. I was full of anger and anyone in my path could be subjected to it. As I grew into my adolescent years, the anger subsided and gave way to pain. I began looking to people to take the pain away. I believed that if I loved enough, gave enough of myself then in return I would get the same thing back and the pain would go away.
Well that didn’t happen, what I eventually learned was I had to love myself and then I could offer love from a place of abundance instead of a place of lack. When you find yourself unable to offer unconditional love, you need to find out why. The Bible gives a command to “love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you” (Matthew 5:44) and then it gives a promise if you do this “you may be children of your Father in heaven (Matthew 5:45).
I’m not saying in order to get to heaven you have to be subjected to abuse or mistreated but what I take these verses to say is, in order to have a chance of entering the pearly gates, you have to forgive those that mistreat you, love them and pray for them.
It’s hard to hate someone you pray for. It’s hard not to forgive someone you pray for. It’s hard to not love someone you pray for. Give it a try. Has someone mistreated you and you wanted to lash out at them or maybe you even did lash out at them? Stop what you are doing and pray for them. Not the vengeful pray that many are accustom to (God get them). NO!! Pray that God gives them the desires of their heart. Pray if anything is lacking in their heart, that it is fulfilled. Pray for their soul. Pray that God will use you to be a pray warrior for them.
You don’t have to be in the presence of a person to pray for them. All you have to do is be in a right relationship with God so He can hear the prayer you offer on their behalf. Now remember…. You can only truly offer love from an abundance. If you know there are things in you that aren’t right towards this person, ask God to clean you up first and then pray for them.
If this helped you at all, please leave a comment on my Facebook community page. I would love to hear your story. Don’t forget to share on social medial.
Until Next Time,
by Coach Tina | Sep 8, 2016 | Encouragement, Growth
It is good for me to be afflicted so that I might learn your decrees. Psalms 119.71
There are many scriptures in the bible that say how we are overcome by different trials in our lives, how trials come to make us stronger, and even that moments of despair can be good for us. I will never go against the Word of God – the Word is the Word. However, let’s talk about this, no one likes pain or to be troubled. In fact, most of us will do whatever we have to do in order to avoid a painful or troubling situations. So when I came across this scripture, I asked some questions “how can afflictions (pain) be good?” And “why do I have to go through them to learn a decree (a law)?” I don’t know about you but I prefer to learn in peace and happiness. But facts don’t lie, some lessons can only be learned from afflictions. I am not an advocate for corporal punishment, but I will be the first to admit when my children were growing up I used “the rod of correction”. I’m sure at some point we all have used a chosen punishment as a form of discipline with our children.
Why, then, is it not appropriate for God to do the same with us? I love my children but God’s love is far greater than mine could ever be. So surely, He would do whatever He has to do to show us that 
love, even discipline.
We have all seen that child who regardless how many times we tell them not to do something, they test the water and try it anyway. There comes a time when you have to take “verbal command” further and provide discipline to assist with understanding your request. Are you that child? Has God told you to do something or not to do something and you did it anyway? Have you placed Him in a position where additional discipline is required?
I’ve said many times before, “what God has for you is for you” however, why do you expect God to continuously reward you when you aren’t obeying His commands? Now don’t get all uptight, God is not like man, He will provide you with your needs in spite of you. The bible says He provides rain on the just and the unjust. But just think what He provides for those who obey His commands and live according to His will. One of my favorite verses is Psalms 84:11 For the LORD God is a sun and shield: the LORD will give grace and glory: no good thing will He withhold from them that walk uprightly. Another version says “no good thing will be withheld from those that walk with integrity. Integrity is doing the right thing even when no one is looking. God wants you to have the best of the best BUT He wants you to live a life of integrity.
So I have found another “favorite” verse. Although, I don’t like afflictions – I can look at them as God’s way of teaching me, of loving me, of correcting me. I know those afflictions are striping away my own desires and helping find His. They are helping me grow into the person He desires me to be.
Until Next Time,
by Coach Tina | Sep 1, 2016 | Encouragement
Have you ever heard the statement “the eyes are the window to the soul”? I would have to say it’s one of the most honest statements I’ve ever heard. It’s actually a scripture, who would thought? People walk around with smiles on their faces but if you look into their eyes you can see hurt and pain. You see a lack of trust. You see betrayal. You see dishonesty. If you ever want to know the soul of a person look into their eyes – THE EYES DON’T LIE.
Many of you think you know me. You’ve either read my book, attended a conference or workshop, you’ve been a part of a group I’ve sponsored, you’ve read my blogs (I do share a lot), or you figure you know me personally. But I hate to burst your bubble, you don’t know me. You know the parts of me that I allow you to know. You don’t know what keeps me up crying at night. You don’t know the struggles I have. You didn’t know that although I pray continuously, there are times when I feel God don’t hear me. You didn’t know that even though I am constantly encouraging others, that I have moments of depression (thank God for a strong support group).
I remember one day looking in the mirror and my eyes were shallow and dark. I thought things were okay. But again, THE EYES DON’T LIE. After sitting down and taking an inventory on my life, I had to be honest with myself…things were not okay. I had fallen back into old habits of trying to please everyone. Old habits of not taking care of myself. Old habits of trying to do everything. And my eyes told the story.
Have you ever taken a moment and really looked into your eyes. Sadly, many people can’t do it. I have had many clients when asked to look at themselves in the mirror would begin to cry and look away. Many of them saw failure, ugliness, defeat, a victim, hurt, pain, lack… What you see is what you see! But you have to look past it all and ask yourself “why do you see those things?” Was it something someone else said to you? Is it because of behaviors? Is it your past? Why do you see those things?
You were fearfully and wonderfully made. You were created in the image of God. You were designed with specific intent. God don’t see you as any of those things. He sees you as His child, as His creation, as His masterpiece, as the apple of His eye. If you are around people that make feel less than this, you are in the company of the wrong people and you need to change your environment.
Go to the mirror. What do you see? Do you see hope? Do you see joy? Do you see a future? Or do you see what others have labeled you? Do you see what others have called you? Do you even know who you are anymore? Transparent moment – I didn’t know who I was for a long time. I only saw myself as a daughter, a wife and a mother. But I am so much more than that.
There is a story in the bible where Jesus healed a blind man (Mark 8:22-26). Jesus spit in his eyes and then touched them but the man’s sight was distorted. Jesus touched him again and the man was able to see clearly. Now there is so much I could take from that passage and maybe one day I will but today I want you to focus on verse 25, then He put His hands on his eyes again and made him look up. And he was restored and saw everyone clearly. When you look in the mirror you are seeing what man sees. Look up, then look again. Ask God to help you see what He sees.
I completely understand how you can get caught up in everything you’re not but now is not the time. Now is the time to push forward and do the things God has assigned for you do. When the enemy comes against showing you all your flaws or inadequacies, stand up straight look him in eyes and say JESUS PAID IT ALL. God knew you were going to make mistakes. He knew you were going to have bad days. He knew all of it and that’s exactly why He called you. The world is not looking for a perfect person they are looking for a person who loves a PERFECT God and willing to spread His love.
Until Next Time,
by Coach Tina | Aug 15, 2016 | purpose
I went for my first post-op appointment today. The last time I walked into that office, I was walking around with a swollen belly looking like I was pregnant. I was in so pain and ready for some relief. This time I walked in able to admire the wonderful scenery. You see my doctor had created a very welcoming environment for expecting mothers. Moms and dads were sitting quietly chatting with each other and other patients. They were swapping stories about how excited they were for the baby to come into the world. I remember one lady even mentioning that she wasn’t financially prepared but couldn’t wait to see her bundle of joy.
As I sat and listened to all the chatter around me, I was drawn to one couple in particular. They had just found out the sex of their baby. They were so excited. As they burst through the door with their ultrasound photo in hand, the dad was beaming from ear to ear. They sat down and began to text all their family and friends to share the good news. I remember hearing the mom ask, “Is that everyone?”
I remember once while pregnant with one of my kids, we were in the office when a couple walked out in tears. The doctor was unable to find a heartbeat and additional testing would have done to determine if the baby was still alive. I could only imagine the heartbreak and fear.
Where are you going with this, Tina? Many of you have been impregnated with a purpose but you have not taken the time to receive proper care during the pregnancy. Now, you think you are ready to birth this wonderful bundle to the world and well, there could be complications.
You see going to the doctor while pregnant is not just to make sure the baby is developing correctly, it is to help make sure the mother is physically and mentally prepared to give birth. It is to make sure the baby’s heartbeat is strong enough to go through the birthing process. It is to make sure there are no birth defects that could cause the baby to die at an early age. There are certain abnormalities that can be detected prior to the baby being born and ultimately “fixed” before the baby is even born. I hope you see where I’m going with this but in case you don’t let me make it a little clearer.
When you fail to seek help prior to birthing your purpose (starting your business, beginning your ministry) you take the chance of the purpose being birth prematurely, with birth defects and worse you could die during the birthing process.
- Premature Birth. Just like the couple texting all their family and friends about the sex of their baby, we go around sharing our vision with anyone and everyone willing to listen. Stop doing that! Realize everyone will not support your vision. But more importantly, you take the chance of giving birth to something that’s not ready to come into the world in order to appease other people. Don’t do it!!
- Birth Defects. When you don’t seek help with your business, you can put out a product with defects
. Things are bound to show up with a new business; however, many issues could be avoided if you would have just spoke to a trained professional concerning what you are doing. For example, some business fold because the owner failed to take care of the legal aspects. Do you have your Tax ID number? Do you need liability insurance?
- Death During Birth. Many people don’t realize how much work goes into being an entrepreneur. I remember when we had our first restaurant, we were so excited until we began working 80 hours per week, our marriage began to suffer, we weren’t able to spend time with our kids, and my husband’s health suffered. Needless to say the excitement ended quickly. Are you ready to give up life the way you know it to help someone else? Are you really ready?
I have been given the assignment to help you find your purpose but once you’ve become impregnated, you need to seek help from a business coach. You need to prepare yourself for birth. Starting a business is not just waking up one day and deciding you will work for yourself. Nope!!! You need to be prepared. You need to do your research. What does the IRS require for the business you are about to start? Can you operate from your home? Do you need a license? What about liability insurance? How much time will you need to invest in this business? Who are you targeting? What are you offering?
I’m not trying to discourage you from starting your business. Because you know me, I’m all about empowerment and the best way to be empowered is to have your own!!! But what I AM telling you is don’t skip the necessary prenatal care. Don’t birth something into this world that will only last for a few months because you weren’t prepared. Do your homework. Everything you need to be the best version of yourself, is inside of you. Sometimes you just need help bringing it forth.
UNTIL NEXT TIME,
world. When young girls are found lying in the street and NO one seems to know what happened. It makes you wonder what in the world is really going on.
